Saving Time L. Penseur
January 1, 2003
I have been hearing wonderful things about a new drug called Provigil, marketed by a company called Cephalon. I thought it was a piece of cookware at first, but never mind. A guy described as a "hip cultural reporter" for the Washington Post has tried it, and if Re:generation ain't hip, who is? His description of the drug's effect is intriguing: "You feel that you have been given a gift of time and it is too precious to waste." Sounds fantastic. I will take some tomorrow at 8:00 a.m., just half an hour before I head off for work.
P Hour. I take the pill with some hesitation. Isn't it kind of unlikely that I will find happiness in this lousy little pill? I'm taking 100 mg, half the recommended dose. Let's not rush it.
Hour Four. I'm having a good morning at the office. I feel none of my usual desire to take a nap, no mid-morning sluggishness. Instead I feel crisp and assertive. I have a cup of herbal tea and enjoy its zesty yet subtle flavor.
Hour Five. Andy wants us all to go out together and have lunch. I point out to him, in a calm and collected manner, that there is no reason to leave our desks for something as minor as sandwiches. I offer to watch the phones, which the editorial assistant gratefully accepts.
Hour Seven. Our editorial assistant did not welcome my suggestions for improving her office efficiency. I am afraid I had to be a bit brutal and ban her from answering calls for the afternoon. I put her to licking envelopes, disregarding her fears of a glue-induced seizure. Where do people get these crazy ideas?
Hour Ten. People have already left work. Weak, very weak. I, on the other hand, am a smoothly functioning machine. Andy has left behind his laptop, so I take the liberty of reading through last month's submissions. ...
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