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LeadershipWinter 2006

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Behind Closed Doors: Sally Morgenthaler's Story
No one knew what was happening at the parsonage.

How did you learn your husband's sexual addiction had led him to molest the neighbor's daughter?

We were on vacation, and the neighbor watching our house called to say he'd picked up a phone message from a detective wanting to speak to my husband. I thought it was so strange, and when I mentioned this to my husband, his face went white.

The day we got back from vacation, the detective called. "Mrs. Morgenthaler, we have reason to believe that your husband has been involved in a molestation case with the girl who lives next door. She told her school counselor a few weeks ago. He needs to turn himself in."

I hung up the phone and went to the garage (it was kind of his haven) to tell him the police wanted him.

He minimized his behavior. "Well, something might have happened, but we were just playing together and she must have misunderstood," he said.

Perhaps out of my own denial, I decided to believe him.

Were there any clues through the years that something was wrong?

I met my former husband in high school. We were married right after my senior year of college. He had a conversion experience in his last year in college, and he said God was calling him to seminary.

We were both in our late twenties when he accepted his first church position. We had a young son, and soon afterward our daughter was born.

I certainly had no idea that he had developed a secret addiction to pornography (he'd been introduced by a relative at the age of 12 or 13). I did know early on in our marriage that something was not quite right. Our relationship was strained and distant. He worked long hours, which is not unusual in the ministry. However, after a few years, both I and the office staff began having problems finding him during the day. Later I would wake ...



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