Confronting controversy with character and grace. Spring 1998 Ben Patterson Current Trends & Columns

ARTICLE TOOLS

Find similar articles E-mail this page

The things that have driven me to my knees.

Like the balmy May evening I was ordained. Then I was forced to my knees by Presbyterian custom. Decked out in a black robe, I was sweating profusely as I knelt on the church's carpet. About twenty elders surrounded me for the laying on of hands—the climax of the service. I typically do not kneel to pray; it hurts my knees, and my legs tend to cramp. The combined weight of all those hands was pressing me into the carpet and bending me over.

And the prayers! Long and sonorous. I needed air! I needed to stand up! I needed to run outside and tear off that infernal robe! That was altogether prophetic of what was to come in ministry in the years ahead.

I was on the verge of struggling to my feet when my senior pastor began to pray, "Lord, as Ben feels the weight of these hands … " I was listening. He continued, " … may he also feel the weight of the responsibility that is his." I groaned and prepared again to get up. Then he prayed, "But may he also feel the strength of your everlasting arms holding him up." I stayed on my knees, cramps and all, and murmured "Amen."

Life is more interesting for those who come at the ministry from this posture. It's like the little boy in the Chesterton parable who was granted a wish: he could be tiny or he could be a giant. The wish was granted, and at first being a giant was great fun. The Pacific was a wading pool. The Rockies were a dirt-bike course. Newark, New Jersey, could be squashed like a cigarette butt. But after a while life got boring. Everything was beneath him. There wasn't much to do or anyone to do it with. It's lonely being a giant.

Had he chosen to be tiny, his backyard would have been the Brazilian rain forest, ...

Like the preview? To read this complete article and 20,359 more in the archive—JOIN NOW! Easily find high-quality, well-researched materials that provide a Christian perspective on topics ranging from headlines to history. Start using this invaluable tool TODAY for preparing your Bible studies, presentations, class lectures, sermons, meetings, and more.
It's easy and quick to join: 2-for-1 Deal. Two powerful resources for 1 great price! A 1-Year Membership to CTLibrary & a 1-year print subscription to the magazine of your choice! Enjoy your first 7days online FREE! Only $49.95 1-Year Membership Plus your first 7 days are FREE! You won't be charged until after your free trial. Only $49.95 1-Month Membership Includes automatic renewal each month. Only $9.95 1-Year for Print Subscribers Special offer if you are currently a print subscriber to Christianity Today, Leadership journal, Books & Culture or Christian History & Biography. Only $29.95 first year Brought to You by Christianity Today Int'l		FREE e-Newsletter! Even if you're not a member you can take advantage of the free "Christian News & Research" twice monthly e-newsletter! Sign up today for the FREE e-newsletter!   Note: Members also automatically receive this free e-newsletter.