What to Say About Sex
April 1, 2002
A cartoon shows a minister in the pulpit with a sack over his head. A single adult says to a pewmate, "Well, I see the pastor is preaching from Song of Solomon today." That cartoon reflects the church's mixed signals to single adults. Addressing sexuality and singleness in the church isn't easy. "Why preach on that?" one pastor retorted. "It's simple: No! End of discussion." Rarely is it the end for the 73 million adults who populate Singleland USA. One single asked what to do about his sexual temptations. "Have you tried talking to God about it?" I replied. "To God!" he sputtered. "You can't talk to God about stuff like that!" "Why not? He already knows." "Oh, no!" he moaned, his head in his hands. But not talking to God about sex would be like not talking to Bill Gates about computers. Who knows more about sexuality than its Creator? If we do not talk about it, the silence forces single adults to look elsewhere for answers and support. As Jenell Williams Paris wrote in Christianity Today (11/12/01), "When Christians are silent and TV is loud, it's obvious which message will be heard." Here's where pastors can begin. Encourage healthy relationships with members of both sexes. I often point to Jesus' having his feet anointed by a "sinful" woman. She "wet his feet with tears, wiped them with her hair, kissed them, and poured perfume on them" (Luke 7:37-38). Can you miss the sensuality here? When was the last time you had your feet washed, kissed, and massaged? Ever? What was the Holy Spirit thinking by including this in Scripture! Jesus, if uncomfortable, certainly did not act like it. He defended her against the Pharisees who criticized her. Address the core loneliness and emptiness. Many single adults sit in worship on Sunday after ... Here are other articles pertaining to "Lord of the Ring-less"
Rubbing Out the Singles Pastor
Why we do ministry mob-style.
by Chris Seay
Singular Hope
Don't tell the unmarried to "be content." Here's a better response.
by Kimberly Hartke
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