Finding True North Confused and aimless? You can recover your sense of direction. John Koessler
October 1, 2005
During my second year of pastoral ministry, I attended a pastors' conference. Of the many speakers, I now recall only one, and all I remember is his conclusion. At the time he was the pastor of one of the largest churches in the nation, a successful author and renowned speaker. As he approached the end of his long ministry, his message was a reflection on his experiences. He listed some of the benefits he had enjoyed as a pastor. He described the free suits one of the members of his church had purchased for him and the free car provided for his use. He mentioned the beautiful house in which he lived at the church's expense and the generous salary. The list was long and impressive enough to make me, pastor of a small and struggling church, both envious and cynical. I grew increasingly uncomfortable as he continued, because I knew where all this was heading. "What if I had not been given all these benefits?" he was going to ask. "Would I still serve my Lord?" I knew what the answer would be. He would say, "I have searched my heart, and by God's grace, I would." It was a muggy summer evening, and my clothes were limp from the heat. The auditorium was crowded with more than a thousand pastors, and I was feeling out of place, overwhelmed by the parade of celebrity speakers. I was wishing I hadn't come. Things weren't going well in my church, and I had come to the conference harboring a secret hope that I'd make some connections that would open the door to a different place of ministry. The last thing I wanted to hear about was his large salary, free suits, free car, and beautiful manse. Sure enough, the question came. "What if I had never been given all these things?" the speaker boomed. "Would I still serve my Lord?" I slumped lower ...
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