Conversations
July 1, 2000
Wed without dread
Jody Vickery's article "How I Stopped Dreading Weddings" (Spring 2000) did not convince me he is healed from his exasperation. Some suggestions: Encourage couples to express themselves in the wedding ceremony so that they don't feel like stand-up, cut-out, cardboard figures repeating words written for them to say. Simplicity is not always the rule. Support the couple in being who they are in Christ. Invite the couple (and their children) to dinner at the parsonage at the conclusion of counseling and in advance of the wedding. By the time the wedding comes, I have more love to give the couple because of our table fellowship. Sharing a meal together involves the pastor's family in wedding ministry. At present, my family includes three kids under five—our wedding dinners are a highlight of our shared ministry. Develop a wedding ministry that includes lay leaders trained as sponsors for the couple. Encourage a mentoring relationship for the bride and groom with a married couple in the church. Praying beyond the sick list
Thank you for Donna Schaper's "When Public Prayer Gets Too Personal" (Winter 2000). Leaders can use several approaches to avoid prayer meeting becoming solely an organ recital (loose livers, leaky lungs, and sickly stomachs). - Use a printed prayer list to teach a broader approach. Include praises and thanksgivings, and list not only those physically healed, but those who have joined the church recently. Mention spiritual blessings and national concerns. List missionaries by name; highlight a particular nation for prayer. List church ministries—upcoming outreach events, retreats, or a newly formed class.
- Ask, "What has God done in your life that is so good you have to share it?" Then silently wait for people to answer. Add their answers, when appropriate, to the list.
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