Chronically Wounded and Needy
April 1, 1997
For the third time in a week, Ed Hastings burst into my office with a health
crisis-only this time, it was really serious. He threw his arms around me
and began to weep. "Pastor Matt," he choked, "you better start planning my
funeral. I think I have AIDS."
As it turned out, Ed had never engaged in high-risk behavior nor been tested
for aids. It was simply Ed's way to up the ante on his personal problems.
So as he clung to me, sobbing and shaking, I began to mentally list his other
ailments. Over the past seven years, Ed had called the Mercy Ambulance crew
for a half dozen alleged heart attacks (one during a worship service), two
cases of dehydration (he forgot to drink), an ulcer, and a possible hernia
(it was just a pulled groin muscle). I also recalled my tri-weekly sessions
to deal with Ed's depression, addictions (including pot, sex, alcohol,
prescription drugs-to date), suicidal thoughts, relational crises, employment
struggles, family problems.
For six years I had pastored Ed through every crisis, praying with him in
countless hospitals and emergency rooms. But his "AIDS crisis"
was the last straw. I finally realized that Ed's soul functioned like a sieve:
the more I poured in, the more he leaked out. After dozens of crisis counseling
sessions, Ed was still looking to me to fill him up, and my arm was weary
from pouring.
Ed represents a growing subgroup in our increasingly dysfunctional society.
Carl George calls them EGRs-the Extra-Grace-Required parishioners.
Gordon MacDonald prefers VDPs-Very Draining People. I like
CWN—the Chronically Wounded and Needy parishioner.
Who are CWNs?
Like Ed, every CWN is, first, deeply wounded. Often tramautized
by abuse, abandonment, or family dysfunction, ...
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