HOW TO TALK TO THE UNCHURCHED
Doug Self
July 1, 1985
Talking to unchurched people about spiritual matters is sometimes uncomfortable. Nervous fidgeting, blank stares, and vague replies seem clues to veiled disinterest. Ever wish the unchurched person was as interested in spiritual life as you are? I've discovered that in many ways they are. Almost everyone has definite spiritual ideas; most have had some sort of religious experience. Some feel close to God and are content with their spiritual beliefs; many are willing to talk about their spiritual lives. But not if you start with dogma. I've learned that if I lead off with doctrine, people retreat in fear and trembling. They entrench themselves for a battle. In the past my tendency has been to continue to storm their fortifications. It's not surprising I have not helped many that way. After several such experiences, I decided I did not know much about the spiritual lives of non-churched people. I've spent my life in church; I needed to develop some open-ended questions to draw the unchurched out—and to draw me in. Many of the questions I've found helpful come from the context I find myself in with a person. No one set of questions works in all situations. But some I have found helpful are: What turns you off about religion? What do you think God is like? When have you felt closest to God? What person has been most influential on your beliefs and values? The next part of the conversation is most difficult for me—listening to the answers. I listen to understand, not to correct. I listen for feelings, reactions, motivations. I want to understand what a person believes and why. Only then can I ask more questions. After I understand where a person is, I can begin to help identify spiritual needs and determine some direction, ...
Like the preview? To read this complete article
and 18,013 more in the archive—JOIN NOW!
Easily find high-quality, well-researched materials that provide a Christian perspective on topics ranging from headlines to history.
Start using this invaluable tool TODAY for preparing your Bible studies, presentations, class lectures, sermons, meetings, and more.
|
It's easy and quick to join:
Brought to You by Christianity Today Int'l |  |
|
| 
Find similar articles
E-mail this page
